Oh No You Didn’t!

The other night I realised that I hadn't seen the whole of The Muppets Bohemian Rhapsody video so pulled it up on You Tube to let Jessica watch it with me. She really didn't like it, didn't understand it at all. It took me a few seconds to realise that she had no idea about Queen's original video, so by the miracle of t'internet we watched that next. And then we went on to watch 'I Want To Break Free' and a couple of other ones. We watched quite a few actually, singing along to the ones we knew. 

Jessica became extremely confused though. Where was the GIRL singer? Didn't Queen HAVE a girl singer? Why had they picked the name QUEEN if it had a boy lead singer?? I ducked out of that one I'm afraid, I'll add that to the list of ones I will explain to her 'later.' Along with the news that Freddie is dead. Freddie DIES???

Anyway, that kinda leads me on to my next point, if you will excuse a sideways step. You may need to know a little about Iris Robinson here and here before you go any further.

I heard the infamous radio program in which she said:

"I have a very lovely psychiatrist who works with me in my offices and his Christian background is that he tries to help homosexuals trying to turn away from what they are engaged in." 

At the time I had an image of her "very lovely psychiatrist" banging his head off his desk as she pointed towards the Bible for words like "abomination" and "sin." 

This afternoon I saw this Facebook group. It has been set-up to:

". . . get the iconic song Mrs Robinson - made famous by the 1960's hit The Graduate - to number 1 in next Sunday's chart in honour of Northern Ireland's disgraced first lady, Iris Robinson. The naughty little minx. . ."

I know it isn't very likely that the song will make it to number one - not without a major thrust with-in the rest of the UK. But I have bought my copy. Just in case one more makes a difference. It is only 79p after all. And it IS sooooo apt. Isn't it?

EDIT:

Just found this :D

Brrr!

Eeek! Don't go out if you can manage not to! We HAD to go out this evening and on the return (slow, slooow, SLOWWW - YOU ARE GOING TOO FAST!!) journey I prised my frozen fingers apart long enough to take a photo of the car (outside) temp.

That's pretty damn cold! Isn't it?

You Know You Are A Mummy When . . .

. . . you are ironing your husband's new shirt and you look at the label to see if there is room to write his name on . . .

Homework Hilarity . . .

Jessica usually has her homework done by the time I get home from work. If she hasn't, it is because she hasn't understood it, and by the time I am drafted in to help there may have been tears already, or Jessica may have entered her 'silly half-hour'. In the past couple of weeks I have had to help with fairly difficult comprehension (which I used to love doing), and on one occasion had to seek help from my 13 year old son on how to do Long Division!

Last night was another difficult comprehension. The passage was about airports, aeroplanes, air-traffic controllers, freight, and the functions of an airport. It helps if you know what 'function' means. Jessica has started to display her mother's "AARRGHHH TOO MANY BIG WORDS CANT COPE DOES NOT COMPUTE" mode.

We worked through the questions about pre-packed meals and hundreds of thousands of air-borne movements. Then we came to "What alterations would need to be carried out to the aircraft in order to allow it to carry freight?"

After explaining for the third time what freight was and putting across the possible size of it by mentioning fork-lift trucks, Jessica still couldn't quite grasp what alterations would need to be done, so I tackled it from the opposite side . . .

"Imagine the plane is a massive empty balloon. What would you need to put IN for passengers?" She thought about this for a millisecond and came up with,

"HELIUM!"

Grrr. It is late. I want MY TIME NOW. I do not want to be doing homework. Stop. Being. Silly. Although, I may have to laugh at you now as you are finding it so hilariously funny.

"Ummm. . . ok. . .  let's think again. The plane is completely empty. There is nothing in it. What would you need in there for the passengers?"

"WHY? What happened to the balloon? Did it BURST?"

"Time for bed. Night night."

Personally, I think that if teachers want homework done at home, they ought to come home and supervise it.

Wise UP!

I am just back into work after a quick trip to the post office and the local pound shop, where I bought a set of scissors.

The woman behind the till asked me if I was over 21.

-.-

I have been over 21 for *counts on fingers* 21 years!